In Meg Ryan’s famous (infamous maybe?) orgasm scene from the classic 80’s film ‘When Harry Met Sally’ we have a fellow diner responding with ‘I’ll have what she’s having!’. Obviously this is a bit of fun but the reality for many of us is that we do often want others have!
The sting in the tale of comparison is that what is best for us, is rarely what others have. Ouch!
An ironic thing that I’ve learned over the years is people for whom we may feel sorry when we view what they physically or financially ‘lack’ may actually feel sorry for us when they see what we ‘have’! This ‘lack’ and ‘have’ is really about what we value.
It’s simpler to assess our impact or influence by what we have – our job, where our kids go to school, where we live, the car we drive, how we spend our holidays. This is an easy-to-measure yardstick against which we can hold ourselves and others.
Much harder to measure is who we are. There is no obvious metric. This includes our genuine happiness, our level of contentedness even in the midst of physical lack, our mindset. These are the things which can seem ethereal but are the core from which our expectations, attitudes and behaviours are driven.
It’s also much more difficult to compare… and that’s partially the point. Focusing more upon our own emotional and spiritual health enables us to more effectively empower and support others. Impact and influence starts with ourselves.
Do you really want what she’s having?
Let Hope Rise.