DO or WITH – which is more important?

My wife and I often wonder what we did with all that spare time we must have had before the kids came along. Not that we’re longing for the ‘good old days’, but rather understanding that we probably didn’t place as much value on our time back then.

The more full life becomes, the greater the value you place on your time. Simple law of economics really: scarce resource + high demand = increased value! As a dad, it’s easy for me to consistently place my interests or my (perceived J) needs ahead of my boys’. And sometimes, this is entirely appropriate. Other times, not necessarily so…

A key I’ve learned parenting over the past 16 years is that I don’t necessarily have to enjoy the stuff I do with my kids. The enjoyment should come in the fact I’m doing it with my boys, shoulder-to-shoulder. Be it playing soccer, going for an early morning swim, helping them with homework, watching Minions for the 10th time, or guiding them in the finer points of Monopoly… Don’t get me wrong, I often DO enjoy these things, but not always!

The focus of enjoyment should be our kids, not the thing we’re doing. I find that if I remember this very simple point the time I invest with my boys is likely to be much more enjoyable for everyone involved!


What do you think?